FOR NOW, I'm still at work - but the days are counting down. My doctor wants me to take at least one month off to rest and "treat by body as if I had mono". He has informed me that FOR NOW he is leaving the decision up to me, but if I decline much further he will have to insist.
When I went to the doctor on Wednesday, I was running a low grade fever, had VERY swollen and tender lymph nodes and am now down to 103 pounds. As a reminder I weighed about 122 in January but even more alarming is that I weighed 119 March 1.
I am wearing down - my body is not handling this well at all (which everyone I know is shaking their head in understanding).
I took yesterday off and can't even tell, I had to get a ride into work today because I was afraid to drive and doubt I will be here all day.
Still alot of family misunderstanding going on right now. My husband is slowly understanding but still believes if I put on weight I would be better. I am seeing a nutrionist soon but tried to tell him that is a concern but not a "cure". (My doctor also told me that if I get below 100 pounds I'm risking being hospitalized for my weight). There is concern all around about the financial impact of this and I am concerned about if I can't return to work after one month (which we all know is a possibility).
I know the right thing is to take off work and put my health first. I'm a planner (which I'm sure is known by now), and this is not settling well in my mind at all.
My "fabulous" insurance company is well known for delaying and refusing claims for CFS - since it's considered a "self-reporting syndrome" and I'm afraid. I will HAVE to have that income or things will be going badly fast at home. Which is why I am asking for advice because I truly don't know what will test etc could "help" my case.
My doctor told me to call him WHEN (not if) I am ready and he is happy to help me with all the paperwork.
I had a dream the other night that I couldn't get out of bed and my husband was trying to get me to go to the hospital - I'm afraid it's a sign.