I did speak to my husband last night. I did tell him that my doctor said I was ALREADY disabled but I'm just pushing my body by working right now. I also told him that my doctor is concerned about me driving (due to the fact I often close my eyes at stoplights, am not as careful as I should be and often have great difficulity keeping my eyes open while driving). I rode to the gas station last night with my daughter and he made her drive (LOL).
He said we will work it out, and let's just see what the neuro consult shows........so he has all of the information, and I can tell it is hitting him now. I hope he will try to do some research or talk to someone, meanwhile I have made an appt. with my counselor (haven't seen her in probably 2 months) just to unload some of my fears etc.
I'm not ready to say that my husband is completely supportive at this point, but I've done what I can and I needed to know that.
I really appreciate everyone's comments, as Lee Lee mentioned, I would TRULY be lost in all of this if it weren't for all of you. (I have quite a bit of empathy for those that were diagnosed pre-internet). This is such a "lonely" disease already, to be able to find some understanding is a relief.
Don't get me wrong, I'm still nervous, I'm still worried, and I'm still hopeful that at some point I will be able to return to work. While it may be too late for me to come back to this job, I do believe deep down that means there may be something else out there for me.
I'm taking it moment by moment and just doing the best I can in the meanwhile.